Hi folks!

i've decided to create a blog.  being that we have a little one joining us soon, i wanted a way to quickly pass on pictures and experiences to all our family and to try and minimize the distance that is felt.  also, just as when stephanie and i were dating, it's good for me to take the time to write out ideas, to solidify them...or to create an even more cluster of them.

this past week was pretty good.  the past couple months i've felt really burdened about my occupational future.  deeply wanted to relad (get out) to move closer to family.  this would also allow me to pursue a job that truly interested me.  this is something that we've been praying for at small groups and has been constantly on my mind.  at work people are beginning to depart to their new units and it's so exciting for me to hear where people are going.  well last thursday i was in my class at school and i had this strange feeling of wanted to remain in the cg.  i realized that it could be just because people were leaving and that i also wanted to go to so many different units.  getting past this point i did a gut check to see if it's the fear of relading, being removed from the security of active duty.  this is the beef of my questioning.  am i wanted to remain in the cg for fear of getting out? 

 i came up with this...my experience since changing departments, going from pollution response to vessel inspections has been really good for me.  i'm having good interactions with warrant officers and junior officers that are encouraging for me.  they've given me a different perspective from the cg that i haven't seen in awhile, if ever.  people wanting to do their job, do it well, but also realizing that being in the cg has it's limits.  adversely my first class (my immediate supervisor) isn't the best guy to be working for as it was while i was in pollution response.  the actual job of inspecting i enjoy.  instead of forcing to make people spend tens of thousands of dollars from an advisory role, i'm ensuring people keep their boats safe and mostly this is a rewarding position.  i'm also within a decent reach of my next promotion which would finally place me in a supervisory role.  the position where i'm current at (e-5) is only short term and the next rank (e-6) would put me where i want to be.  i have a strong desire to finally serve as a true supervisor.  this is the crux of my decision.  

other positive benefits is that it would allow stephanie do as she pleases very comfortably, and that's be the mother first.  i still want to go to so many different places.  i would continue to have a ton of time off.  

all this is to say...i'm still thinking, praying, seeking guidance.  but as we were leaning towards getting out, now we are leaning towards staying in.